In most relationships,  support is given to each other. Often with the best intentions the type of support you give is what you hope to receive in return. But, everyone is different, so each person requires a different type of support.

Understanding Why You Feel That You Have No Support

When you need support the most that you tend not to be receptive to those trying to offer support. You are likely to be snippy, stressed, short-tempered or edgy, even if your partner is trying their best to give you the support you need. And to make matters worse, your partner may not have any idea what type of support you need.

When you feel unsupported, it like your partner doesn’t care about your needs. You may see him or her as  insensitive to your needs. Your emotions may have you feeling you can’t rely or trust your partner. Because of your emotional state, you feel that you can’t rely on your partner. So, you don’t ask for support, even though you need it.  Without a sense of support from your partner, like a a house of cards, your relationship will crumble to the ground. Feeling frustrated having trying their hardest to be supportive, your partner doesn’t know what to do.

Learning to Recognize Your Partner’s Efforts and Communicate Your Needs

Most people in a relationship want to receive support from their partner. But it is important to learn how to recognize your partner’s efforts. even if the type of support being offer isn’t what you need. When support is offered you just need to accept it. And later when you are given a chance, explain to your partner the type of support you need from him or her.

Let’s put this into real-life context. Say, for example, that your sister just lost her job. She is really upset about it and so are you. You are worried about her being able to care for her children.  After telling your partner about the situation, he offers a suggestion.  He thinks your sister to apply for a job at the local gas station.

You can respond through your emotions, which are already rife with worry and fear.

“Now why would you say that? You know that gas station has been robbed three times in the last six months! I didn’t ask you for advice! Why won’t you ever just be there for me? You’re always so insensitive. I can’t talk to you about anything!”

That’s one way you can respond to your partner.  Or, you can say: “I realize that you’re just trying to help. But, right now, I really just need you to listen. Can you just listen to me for a while?”

In both contexts, you will receive a   reaction from your partner. But, if it is support for you that’s needed, you want his respond to reflect that, which is to listen to your concerns about your sister, not hear his suggestions. If your partner understands the type of support you want, he will feel capable of being able to give it.

The Power of Support

Some know people who will be there whether times are good or if it’s a crisis. It’s good to know no matter what the situation, you have someone that you can rely on to be there to support you. This is what everyone needs in a relationship. It’s important that you and your partner effectively support one another.  This will empower you,  and give a sense of security.  It also connects the two of you in a trusting relationship that promotes love and strength that can last a lifetime.