Things That Are A Marriage Saver To Your Relationship

Posted Saturday, December 26th, 2015 | Tagged in : Marriage & Relationship, Marriage Help, Save Your Relationship | Get Your Ex Back By Admin

Marriages fail for various reasons. But, there are things you can do that are a marriage saver to heal your damage relationship. One of the main reasons for failure in a marriage is that the two of you do not see each other the way you use to.  At the beginning of your relationship the two of you felt a strong feeling of intense love. It made both of you feel you wanted to be together forever. So you got married, setup your living arrangement and begin sharing life together.

Now that you are married, you may no longer see eye to eye on what’s important to you. There are arguments over major and trivial things. At least one of you realize that the disagreements and conflicts between you must be worked out to save your marriage. If you could rediscover those feelings you had at the beginning of your relationship when your love was new and all you wanted was to be together.

To rediscover those feelings of intense love you felt at the beginning for each other, here are three things you can do that could be a marriage saver to your relationship.

First: Listen closely to what your partner is saying to you when issues get fierce between you.  But, the best time to talk, is when things are good between you. When you are calm and in a good mood it’s more likely you will be open listening to each other. Be observant to what is said and done. Don’t neglect to stay  in tune to your partner by really listening to him or her. Being observant will keep you in the know about what’s going on with one another.

Second: If you have grown apart, become connected again. Hold on to the love you have for each other. Closeness is vitally important in a marriage. It maintains a lasting love. And being sensitive to your partner feelings and thoughts promotes communication and physical intimacy. If you can stay at a place of closeness, it keeps the connection between you strong.  You’ll see what a different it will make in your marriage.  Show genuine interest and be inquisitive about your wife or husband to keep that spark between you, don’t let it die out. Discover new things together to enrich your relationship. Talk and share each interest. It will keep you connected.

Third: Talk about your memories. Let your partner speak to you about his or her memories, both good and bad from their childhood. There were things from the past that contribute to who you see and love. You may discover that the person you are married to, earlier in their life had fears, which still may be a nagging factor that affects him or her. These things may help you understand your husband or wife better and result in you having a stronger relationship. You may discover things that gives you an insight that changes your perspective about your partner, because of what was experience as a child. It will cause you to show a sensitive side to your partner, who as you have discovered, experience painful things, just like you.

The three things that are highlighted here can be a marriage saver that gives the two of you what you need to stay together through the good and bad times.

Rekindle The Passion You Once Felt

Posted Saturday, December 5th, 2015 | Tagged in : Marriage Help, Marriage Made Easy, Romance & Couple Time By Admin

Have you notice a change in your marriage? What was once a hot and heavy relationship between you, now barely flickers. Over time the relationship you share may become lackluster   The flames of ardor are no longer stirred. After years of being married, things between you may seems mundane and routine. To prevent your marriage from settling into such an existence , you must make it your priority.

These 5 suggestions can help you discover ways to put the fire of passion back in your marriage.

1. Set Aside Time For Romance

Rekindling the passion you once felt for each other, doesn’t have to consume a lot of your time. It can be something as simple as a walk along the beach holding hands, a candlelight dinner, or listening to your favorite songs. The two of you could cuddle up on the couch together and watch a movie or your favorite videos.  Just need to find what works for the two of you. Use your imagination to create some magical moments of romance.

2. Add Spontaneity.

When you are unexpectedly invited to a trendy new restaurant with jamming music and delectable food, that type of spontaneous gesture adds joy and excitement to your day. You can send a text message that expresses feelings of love.  Sending a text message with feelings of love or some flowers, is what adds a spark to an otherwise monotonous day.  A spontaneous gesture creates those moments in life that leads to pleasant memories. And it results in keeping a fire inside of you burning. Think how you would feel to suddenly have something special happen to brighten your day.

3. Listen Attentively!

Listening is such a simple thing to do. Yet, many couples fail to spend time just listening to each other. Taking the time to listen to each other will keep you connected in your relationship. Talk about what’s on your mind to discover what you need and want from each other.

4. Be Enthusiastic

Remember when you first met, how you waited with anticipation for that moment to see each other. The two of you showed interest in what you both did and said. Even with no special plans, there was an excitement of just being together, . This special way you felt was the reason why you got married. Recapturing those feelings again will spark a fire that can restore you once had for one another.

5. Do Something Different, Adventurous

Take that cooking class together. Try an outdoor activity. It doesn’t matter what you do. Try something that takes you out of the comfort zone you have grown accustomed to. Do something where you both can experience something new. Recaptures those special feelings of closeness, like when you first fell in love. If you enjoy reading, you can join other enthusiastic readers to discuss characters and events from books. The two of you can prepare some portions of food that you both enjoy and spend an evening in each other company.

All it takes to rekindle the fire and restore your marriage is wanting to do it. Explore ways to make it happen.

 

How To Stay Connected In Your Marriage

Posted Friday, December 4th, 2015 | Tagged in : Marriage & Relationship, Marriage Help, Relationship Advice By Admin

To weather through the ups and downs, the good times and the bad times, you need  to discover how to stay connected by:

Opening up about what’s bothering you.

Take the time to gain some insight to identify the source of your unhappiness. Maybe you feel emotionally disconnected from your wife or husband. Maybe you feel he or she no longer finds you desirable. After examining things closely, you learn that their behavior has nothing to do with you. And there’s also a possibility that your spouse could be experiencing emotional or physical difficulties too. The bottom line is, unless you open up and discuss what’s bothering you, the two of you could find yourselves drifting farther apart from each other.

Taking The Initiative.

As stated earlier, marriages go through ups and downs. If you are experiencing a down period in your marriage, take the initiative toward staying connected to your wife or husband. Understand that you need to approach the situation with a positive attitude to get back to that place where things are looking up again for the two of you.

Talking things over.

If communication has been difficult between you lately, wait for things to calm down. When the anger has subsided, you will more likely be receptive and open to talking things over. Even if you had a right to be angry, a solution to your problems is easier to reach when enough time has passed where you both want a reconciliation. The two of you may discover that your reactions are based on what you perceived you did to each other. Once your emotions are not heated anymore, you will be able to engage in meaningful conversations with each other toward working out your problems.

Call. Text. Write a note.

When life is hectic and there’s not much time to see each other, taking the time to phone, text, or write a note can help. It is a great way to stay connected to each other. A day can take on a different look and feeling, when  the person you love know you were thinking of her or him.

How To Talk To Your Partner About Money

Posted Friday, December 4th, 2015 | Tagged in : Divorce & Breakups, Marriage Help By Admin

Before you marry that special someone it’s a good idea to talk about your finances. One of the major hurdles that couples struggle with in their marriage is money issues. It is a key factor that leads to heated arguments. So, it is necessary that both of you face this issue to avoid the consequences of having problems between you about money.
It may seem surprising, but many couples don’t even bother to discuss the important issue of money. According to a survey from “Fidelity,” 43 percent of couples didn’t know how much money their partner earned. This statistic is alarming and explain why money is such a hot bottom issue among married couples.

Make having a discussion about money with your wife or husband a priority. Use these talks to have an open conversation regarding your finances where the two of you can work out differences and reach an understanding.

A good approach to take about money is to:

First: Talk about those things that you want to purchase.

If there’s a big money item, before buying it, see how your partner feels about it first. This let him or her know about it, which will avoid an angry reaction later. Don’t sneak out and buy something, be open about it.

Second: It is a good thing to know the credit score of each other, before marriage.

And you especially need to know after the both of you are married. After you’re married, your partner score will affect you. Their score will impact your ability to get a car or house if it is bad. Many millennials admit to bringing credit card debt into their relationship. So, it is important to join together to manage your finances where the partner with the lower credit rating doesn’t burden the other partner. Work out a solution that has a plan to pay the household expenses and the other necessities the two of you share. Take the extra money and place it into an account that can go toward paying off debts.

Third: After getting married, there’s an adjustment period for the two of you.

Instead of thinking “my money,” you must think “our money.”  Plan a budget together, where you make a list of your monthly expenses. After setting aside money for those essentials you must take care of, you can then figure out where the extra money should go, such as, saving, gym membership, date night, or personal grooming.

Fourth: The two of you will have to decide what works best for you in managing your money.

Determine whether you want a join or separate account, or a combination of both. Be aware that you may have different spending habits. If you like to spend big, but your partner is more of a penny pincer, then you would be wise to have two separate accounts. One account can be for shared expenses for the mortgage, insurance, car payment, etc, and you can have a separate account for your personal expenses. The two of you will have to decide what works best for you.

In conclusion: Now that the two of you have shared your financial history, it’s time to plan for the future by making long term goals. If you want a home, it’s not too soon to start saving for it. And don’t forget about your retirement. Even though it may seem like light years away.

How to save a marriage

Posted Saturday, June 15th, 2013 | Tagged in : Marriage & Relationship, Marriage Help, Save Your Marriage, Tips By Admin
Untitled-1Marriage can be something really special. You get to share everyday with the person you love. But, it can also be challenging and frustrating. The question of “How To Save A Marriage?” is a difficult one. It means dealing with serious issues.  And it is different for each couple. Only you can determine what will work in maintaining and preserving your marriage

Through time there has been tried and tested ways that couples have discovered ways on how to save a marriage.  If you want to save your marriage, there are things you must do.

Such as:

Forgive

Mistakes are a part of life. Give your husband or wife a chance to make things right with you. When you forgive, you have to mean it. You must show it in your words and actions. There’s no greater impediment to saving a relationship, if you cannot forgive.

Acceptance

Learn to live with your wife’s or husband’s shortcomings. No one is perfect! Don’t react to every little thing in a negative way. Don’t try to change the person you are married to. Your acceptance is the best thing to give, it says to him or her, I love you just the way you are.

Compromise

Meet your your wife or husband halfway. Be open and flexible. You don’t have to compromise everything. But you should be willing to compromise sometimes, to meet their expectations. If you are the personality type that has to always have your way, it can leave your partner feeling imposed upon all the time. If you are not willing to compromise the problems will continue between you.

Choose thoughtful words

Avoid hurtful words. When the situation has grown intense, choose your words carefully. Speak with a kind tone. Harsh words can drive a wedge between the two of you.  Your words can make it better or worse. So think before you speak. Thoughtfulness is a key ingredient in how to save a marriage and secure a strong relationship.

Assumptions

Don’t assume things based upon your partner’s previous reaction and decision to something . Give your partner an opportunity to explain their actions. Don’t draw a conclusion, before having all the facts. Instead of presuming something, talk things over. Listen to each other with an open mind. Try to work out an issue where you both can agree on a solution.

Never tolerate abusive language nor physical abuse.

If the situation ends up abusive, wait until things calm down, before proceeding toward a solution. Never stick around when there’s physical abuse.  Get professional help as soon as possible.

Apologize

Be willing to apologize if you have done something to hurt your partner. But don’t apologize just to make things better. You really have to mean it. Give thought to why you need to apologize. If you made a mistake, be big enough to admit to it. Don’t let pride get in the way.

Maintain Intimacy

Intimacy is very important to keep your relationship strong. It is a key component in “How To Save A Marriage.” A lack of intimacy can make you vulnerable to go outside of your marriage. If you are having problems, don’t withhold your love as a way to deprive your partner. Nothing can destroy a relationship or marriage more, then a partner feeling unwanted and unloved.

Appreciate your wife/husband.                                               

Find ways whether big or small to always show your wife or husband that you value the things that are done for you.  Take the time to express your love with words and deeds. The only way your wife or husband can know how much you appreciate him or her, is by you showing it.

How To Escape Marriage Boredom

Posted Friday, June 14th, 2013 | Tagged in : Marriage Help, Marriage Made Easy, Relationship Advice, Romance & Couple Time By Admin
Untitled-1Being married can be great. But the mundane everyday stuff can have you falling into a rut. As a couple you must find a way out of this marriage boredom, where each day feels like a repeat of the previous day. To escape the daily marriage  routine, add some excitement.  There are things you can do to escape the predictability of everyday married life.

 

To add a spark to your marriage, try these 4 simple things.

1. Date Night.

One way to create some change in your marriage is to go out on dates with your spouse. The two of you need to have some time together to get away from children and other family pressures. Set aside a few hours for a night of fun. Date night doesn’t have to be expensive. It’s simply about the two of you hanging out together and enjoying each other.  Shut out the rest of the world and tune into one another. You can watch a movie together.  Take a stroll together through the park and check out the sights. Plan an evening preparing a special dish together. Listen to music, play games, or snuggle up and watch t.v. together. The objective is for the two of you to take some time to have fun.

2. Surprises.

When things have become so boring that you and your spouse seem more like room-mates,  then husband and wife, do something unexpected, spontaneous break the routine between the two of you.  Grab your wife or husband and give them a warm tight hug. Surprise your spouse by tenderly kissing them. Whisper something naughty in their ear.  The idea is to do something that pleasantly surprises your wife or husband break out of the routine.

3. Add some adventure.

Do something that the two of you never tried. Consider going camping or hiking for the weekend.  Sign up for art lessons or take a dance or exercise class together.  Motivate each toward a healthy lifestyle.

4. Laugh and play.

A fun way to add some excitement is to play with each other.  How about washing the car together and turning it into fun with water play. Toss sponges at one another. Laugh at something silly. Tickle each other. Have a pillow fight. Act like kids. Laughing and playing together will greatly help to reduce stress. It will keep you and your spouse in a good mood and make the relationship you have enjoyable.

Secrets To A Healthy Marriage

Posted Wednesday, May 29th, 2013 | Tagged in : Marriage Help, Marriage Made Easy By Admin
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With all the divorce going around and all the failed relationships, it makes one wonder whether there is a way to make a marriage work. Here are some of the secrets to what makes a marriage strong and healthy despite all the many challenges in today’s world.

1.  Being right is not always right. One of the secrets to a healthy marriage is to control the desire to always be right. There is nothing to be gained by always wanting to be right in every single argument or discussion. On the contrary, the desire to be right can only mean more fights and more arguments. When each person is fighting to be right, both lose.

2.  Divorce is never an option. The problem with most couples today is that they always tend to believe that when things go wrong, they can always give up on the relationship and get a divorce. Hardly anyone wants to make that extra effort to make the marriage work. One of the most important secrets to a healthy marriage is COMMITMENT. Having such a mindset allows people to find solutions even when it appears that the marriage has reached boiling point. Such would not be possible if the people in the marriage have an exit strategy to fall back on.

3.  There is no such thing as a “perfect marriage”.  One of the common misconceptions is that a person should simply find his or her soul mate and the marriage will go on happily ever after.  However, among the secrets to a healthy marriage is to accept the fact that a “perfect marriage” does not exist. Whenever two people decide to share their lives together, they are bound to find some wonderful moments and some really irritating ones top.  Striving for a great marriage means having a lot of understanding and a huge amount of patience.

4.  Marriage means giving. Most people believe that marriage is a 50/50 partnership. The truth is, it is more like 60/40. Among the secrets to a healthy marriage is to give 60% and to take 40% for both parties. Successful marriages are those where the parties put their spouses first.  There is no room for “looking out for myself first” if you want the marriage to last. If you are more concerned about yourself than your spouse then you are headed for trouble.

5.  Respect. There is no way that love can exist if there is no respect. In a marriage, respect must never be overlooked.

6.  Do not stop dating. Many times we hear people say that it is not the quantity of time that really matters, but the quality of time. One of the many secrets of a healthy marriage is that the quantity of quality time that truly matters. Dating need not mean spending a lot of money. Picnics in a park or simply sharing take-out while watching a sunset requires very little expense but wonderful moments together.

What Does It Take To Have A Strong Marriage?

Posted Monday, May 27th, 2013 | Tagged in : Marriage Help, Marriage Made Easy By Admin

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To have a problem free marriage is a utopian dream. Yet there are things you can do to minimize the conflicts between the two of you, that will enable you to have a strong marriage. The six things presented here have proven to be important factors for couples who have a strong marriage.

Those with a strong marriage:

1. Don’t allow differences to be a constant source of conflict between them. Whether its money, child rearing or something as divisive as religion, those with a strong marriage don’t let their differences drive them apart. They settle their disputes amicably if possible. But if that cannot be done, then they agree to disagree. Experience has taught them to accept that there are differences between them and to simply move on. But there are major barriers to even a strong marriage, such as, being married to someone who core values are opposite of your own. Give your marriage a chance, by seeking out someone who beliefs and values you share. If the two of you are not compatible in those areas that mean the most to you, there will be serious issues that may impede your ability to have a strong marriage.

2. They set aside time for each other. When a relationship is new there’s an effort to please the object of your affection, to win their love. But after becoming partners, some couples take each other for granted. Keep in mind, it takes the same amount of effort to maintain the relationship, that it did for you to win each other. Every now and then, call in the middle of the day, just to say hello. Let the one you love know that you miss them. Couples drift apart when they become preoccupied with other things and stop spending time together. Children and career are the two biggest factors that come between a husband and wife.  Make sure you set aside special time to get away together where you can reconnect and rekindle those special feelings. Take the time to let your wife or husband know how much they mean to you.

3. They take the time to discuss what’s important to each other. They find the time to talk and laugh about things. The lines of communication are kept open. If anything comes up, they are right on it.

4. They interject some spontaneity to breaks the monotony of married life. An unexpected trip together, a weekend at a spa can be just what your marriage needs to give it a spark. These simple acts can stir feelings of love anew again, like when you first fell in love.

5. They realize that Intimacy is an important part of marriage. A good sexual life is  fundamental in maintaining a strong marriage. The intimacy that the two of you share is vital to your marriage. Discuss intimate things with your wife or husband to find out what is comfortable for both of you. Keep the passions burning by stirring up excitement between you.

6.They give their partner space to pursue other interests and to have friendship with others. Just like disinterested partners can cause a marriage to fail, people who cling too tightly to their partner may cause their marriage to slide downhill too. Clinging to your wife or husband too tightly may make them feel stifled and unsatisfied. Refusing to give some space to them to do things or to be with other people may cause them to develop resentment toward you. It is important to allow your wife or husband to pursue interests that gives him or her a sense of satisfaction that’s needed to fulfill their life. Couples in a strong marriage have learned that they need space to do things apart from their partner. That they need to be able to have interests and meaningful relationships with other people.

Save My Marriage (Ten tips on How to Do It)

Posted Monday, May 27th, 2013 | Tagged in : Marriage Help, Save Your Marriage, Save Your Relationship | Get Your Ex Back By Admin

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Everyday you are bombarded by all kinds of advice about relationships and marriage. At mrmarriagesaver  we want to give you important information that you will find helpful.  It is a good idea to think out of the box. Don’t automatically dismiss something without giving it a try. It could be the one thing that will save your marriage. So if you are searching for ways to save your marriage, before it is too late, help is available. At mrmarriagesaver.com you will find resources in the form of articles, products, and services that can assist you with taking on the challenge of saving your marriage.

The ten things listed here are a place to start when you need an answer to your question, “save my marriage.”

 

 

  1. Ask yourself if the spark is still there. If you have fallen into a routine, a comfort zone, you are going to have to shake things up. There has to be a commitment to want to save your marriage. You may have to seek outside help or find resources for ideas and ways to recapture what you once had together.
  2. Is there communication? Second point to look at and ask yourself about is the communication. Is it good? How often do you say the following things to your partner?
    – How are you?
    –  How do you feel about us?
    –  What can we do together to make things right again?
    Notice that none of the phrases contained the word “I”. Make an effort every day to get to know your partner again, their thoughts, their feelings. Ask open-ended questions that will get you talking again.
  3. Look at your weekly routines and make changes.  If you have a guys’ night out and she has a girls’ night out, then choose one night that is just for you as a couple.
  4. Do something spontaneous, out of the ordinary! Suggest to your partner that you book a last-minute trip somewhere. When on the trip, don’t just lie around the pool, go out on boat trips, jeep safari or other thrill seeking adventures. Make it a fun and exciting time together.
  5. . Avoid being critical of your partner.  If you are constantly criticizing your partner then they will always be on the defense. Ok, so she has put on a couple of pounds since you married, chances are so have you.
  6. Don’t have arguments, have discussions.  It is completely untrue that arguments are good for a marriage. Discussions are better as each side can calmly put their point across and at the same time listen to the other. If you feel tempers are getting heated, explain you are walking away and will be back to talk when you have calmed down.
  7. Take the spotlight off yourself. Instead of saying I want to talk, rephrase it to, “Can we talk?” Start thinking like partners, who are working together like a team for the success of your relationship. And as partners the words, (we) (us) should be an integral  part of how you communicate.
  8. Are there any outside influences causing a change in the marriage? Did problems start when you changed jobs, moved to another house, made new friends? If there are any outside influences that you feel are causing a problem in your marriage, then get your feelings out into the open about it. Don’t keep unhappy feelings festering inside.
  9. Put yourself in your partner’s shoes. Think about how he or she feels. You want to go out tonight and he/she does not. Did they have a hard day at the office? Do they feel well? Would they rather do something else? Like watch a game, or cuddle in front of the television?
  10. Don’t just take. Remember give to your partner.  Taking for both partners is natural. Most people enjoy being on the receiving end of things. But, it’s like that old adage, “It’s better to give then receive.” Even if you don’t believe this, you know that when you give something to someone, it has a way of making  you feel good. And to the person that  you are giving something to, it makes them feel loved and appreciated by you.
    If you try the things above and it does not work out for you, don’t lose hope. There are other resources available to you. An independent view can often shred light on the issues that are causing problems in your marriage that you cannot see.

Can My Marriage Be Saved?

Posted Monday, May 27th, 2013 | Tagged in : Marriage Help, Save Your Marriage, Save Your Relationship | Get Your Ex Back By Admin

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If you have had serious problems in your marriage, you are probably asking yourself the same type of question, which is, can my marriage be saved?”

There are certain factors that can indicate whether a marriage can be saved or not. The key factor is, do the two of you want to save your marriage?

When my wife cheated, I felt ripped apart. No way, I thought, could I forgive her. Nor love her again. I needed time to forgive. I needed time to think. And I needed time to heal. I could not may a quick decision based on how I felt at that moment. To me, the question, could my marriage be saved, was no. At that moment, my emotions were intense and out of control.

If your feelings are similar, you need to wait to sort through things, then decide what you should do. But no matter how critical the situation is, the answer to the question, “can my marriage be saved?,” will have to be determined after you have had enough time to assess the situation to decide what’s the best course of action for the two of you.

Look at the following statements. Select the one that best describes your feelings and thoughts about your wife or husband.

  1. Even though I was cheated on, I still love my wife. My family and closest friends told me to leave her. But their advice bothers me.
  2. didn’t spend enough time with my wife. I was busy working. And when I was home, I was preoccupied with other interests. Thinking back, I now know that I took my wife for granted. Not that it is an excuse for her unfaithfulness. But the way I treated her, contribute to her looking outside of our marriage.
  3. When I describe my husband I use words like “thoughtful”, “responsible”, and “considerate.” He’s also a good provider and helps me with the children. I realized that the positive words reflect how I really feel about him.
  4. Despite the anger and hurt I feel, I don’t want to give up on my marriage. I don’t want to end my marriage over a momentary indiscretion. At one time we were “crazy in love”. If I felt that way then, maybe I can feel the same way again.
  5. In a moment of intense bitterness I considered divorce. I did not even want to try to save my marriage. But after some soul searching, I couldn’t bring myself to get a divorce.
  6. If we are both willing to look at what went wrong in our marriage, to understand and make things better, then our marriage can become stronger.

Of course it won’t be easy to save your marriage. It may take professional intervention. It will take a lot of talking and listening. And you will need to make the effort to understand and have the patience to hang in here when things get tough. Nothing less than a commitment to your wife or husband will be needed to see the marriage through. Only then will you be able to answer the question, “can my marriage be saved?”